I spend much of my day on Twitter, either lurking or participating. There are certain things said by some Mommy Bloggers that make me want to go all Exorcist-like on them. I sometimes type in responses in my little Tweetbox but then erase them because, well, it’s just not worth it. After all, they know much more than I do. Just ask them.
So, I was inspired by this post to write my own list.
This list is called “How I would annoy certain people on Twitter” or “Things I’ve done as a Mom that would make some other Mommy bloggers heads spin”.
1. Cry it out. Yep. I’ve let my children cry for hours on end. Even until they puked. Did I feel good about it? No. But, it took one night to work for my oldest son, who is now almost 15 and lived through it. My daughter, it never worked for. And my youngest, who is 6, it didn’t work well either. It didn’t stop me from trying to achieve the same outstanding success I had with my oldest though.
2. I fed two of my children Nestle formula. And guess what? I’d do it again. Smart Start. And want to know the real “shocker”? My hospital gave me the original sample. Also? I feed my family foods that were made by Nestle.
3. I hated breast-feeding. I did it. But it was awful and I had to supplement with formula. Nestle formula. I’ve written about this before but, my step kids who weren’t nursed a day in their life? They were healthier than my kids who were nursed. A lot. For hours on end. For months and months. Through painful, cracked and bleeding nipples.
4. Yes, you should be able to nurse in public. But cover up. I don’t need my kids staring at your boobs at a restaurant. You’re entitled to your rights but I sure as hell am entitled to mine, too.
5. I give my kids tylenol, motrin, eggs, sugar and McDonalds. I let them stay up too late. They play way too many video games. I swear. I scream. We live in chaos. They’re turning out just fine. And they won’t be delusional when they make it into the real world eventually.
6. My boys were circumcised. It’s part of our religion, yes. But I would have done it anyways. Guess what? You can ask my husband, my sons, my dad…none of them even remember their bris. If you spoke with a long ago ex-boyfriend who came over from Russia and was circumcised when he was nine, he remembers the pain. But, he would also tell you that he wouldn’t have it any other way.
7. I never used a baby sling, not ever. I tried it for about thirty seconds. Quite honestly, it annoyed the piss out of me to have my baby hanging from me.
8. Co-sleeping? Only if my kid wakes up in the middle of the night and calls for me. Otherwise, my bed is for my husband and me. Period.
9. My kids will turn out just fine, aside from typical or genetic issues. They will end up no different than a kid who nursed for the first five years of his life, while sleeping in bed with parents and only eating organic vegan.
10. Mommy bloggers are entitled to their opinions, for sure. But the minute they start shoving their beliefs down the throat of others or degrading them for practices that they don’t agree with? That’s when I just want to slip my hands through my computer screen and slap the sanctimonious right out of them.
11. Some people need to get over themselves.