The Olden Days

My son does his homework in the morning. It’s when he’s most alert. I’m not sure where he gets that from because there is NO ONE in our house that can be called a “morning person”. He’s the little lone wolf in the happy early riser category.

This morning, he had a rather large spelling packet that needed to be completed because it seemed we neglected it over this past weekend. Yesterday, he almost missed recess due to the fact that, not only did he not complete it, he didn’t even have it with him. Yeah, that’s my fault. I took it out of his binder (ha, I said binder) and put it away, filed under “to be done this weekend”. Then, promptly forgot about the mere existence of this packet.

So, this morning, while he ate breakfast and watched Family Guy (don’t judge), he also worked on his spelling packet.

My son is also an morning pooper. Yeah, sorry honey, but that little fact goes along with this whole story.

He jumped up from the kitchen table and raced toward the bathroom, calling to me to let me know what he was about to accomplish in there. But also, he wanted me to bring him his homework so that he could finish it while he was doing his business transaction.

I held my breath, opened the door and tossed in his packet and a pencil and shut the door quickly. Man, what does that kid eat?

“Mommy, do you have a clipboard or something hard I can write on?” He yelled.

Couldn’t find a clipboard. But, I found, laying on the counter by the pile of “things to do over the weekend”, another pile. Of records. As in…vinyl, long playing records used on a turntable of days past.

I grabbed another quick, deep breath of fresh air before opening the bathroom door again and gently tossed in the “Surrealistic Pillow” by Jefferson Airplane album for him to use as a hard surface.

There he sat, a deep red ring forming on his little, meaty tushie while he did his morning work.

Finally, done and done.

Out he comes, along with a funky odor (seriously, this kid needs to cut down on smelly foods). In one hand, his completed homework. In the other, the album he used as a lap desk.

“Mom. What is this thing anyways?” He asks, handing me the album.

“It’s a record album.” I respond, forgetting that this kid is only 8 and didn’t grow up with these.

“What’s it for?” He’s looking at this foreign-to-him object with curiosity.

Oh wow, WOW. Clearly I have not done my job educating my youngest child.

“It’s what we used to use, awhile back, to listen to music.”

“Like a giant disc?”

“Yep. A large, vinyl disc that we’d put on a record player. We couldn’t dance and stomp around because it would scratch the record and make it skip.”

“Mom, this is dumb. It just goes to show you that nothing cool came out of the olden days.”

Sure they did. And, just so I can prove it, here are some really cool things that were around when I was young…back in the OLDEN DAYS:

Mario Brothers…which, my love, you still play and at one point was completely obsessed with.

Transformers…which are still around and COMPLETELY frustrate the living crap out of you, my lovebug.

Pac-Man…which you seem to enjoy playing when we go to the orthodontist.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles…didn’t you love those creepy green dudes? Yes, you did. Admit it.

The Smurfs…which you forced me to go see with you and I wanted to smash my face into a wall. And then, you wanted to collect all the McDonalds toys from the movie. You remember that, don’t you?

What about Silly Putty and Legos? And how about PEZ, Candy Necklaces and Bubble Tape?

Guess what? Nickelodeon came out in those Olden Days you speak of with such distaste.

So you see, my little Munchkin, all those things that you love today…

They came from the “Olden Days” and were SO COOL that they are still around today.

Point SO not taken, he grabbed his backpack, his iPad and headed to the car to be driven to school.

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