When You’re The Mom Of Teens…

When you’re the mom of teens, you laugh in the face of a 2 year olds tantrum…those have NOTHING on teenagers.

When you’re the mom of teens, your indoor voice becomes your outdoor voice simply to make sure you can be heard over their obnoxiousness.

When you’re the mom of teens, Footloose, Fun and Fancy Free are simply the names of movies.

When you’re the mom of teens, their angst becomes your nervous breakdown.

When you’re the mom of teens, your internal thoughts have more swear words than a late night truck stop.

When you’re the mom of teens, panic is the new calm.

When you’re the mom of teens, just because you can sleep through the night doesn’t mean you CAN sleep through the night.

When you’re the mom of teens, grey is rose colored.

When you’re the mom of teens, you look longingly at small children and remember when.

When you’re the mom of teens, you rethink your decision on becoming a parent, despite the fact that it’s just too late to take it back.

When you’re the mom of teens you realize that as exhausting as it was to have little ones, it’s got NOTHING on the bigger ones.

When you’re the mom of teens, you begin complaining more about them than you do your husband.

When you’re the mom of teens, you spend a lot of time apologizing to your own parents while thinking to yourself that you were NEVER as awful as your own flesh and blood are.

When you’re the mom of teens, you begin counting down the days until the house is an empty nest.

When you’re the mom of teens, you spend a lot of time taking deep breaths and talking yourself down.

When you’re the mom of teens, you also spend a lot of time visualizing slapping the them silly…and not in a funny way.

When you’re the mom of teens, you realize how really good you had it when they were small.

When you’re the mom of teens, you begin to notice that smell, which is encapsulating the house…it’s coming from your kids room yet there is NO WAY IN HELL you’re going to set foot in there. So you shut the door.

When you’re the mom of teens, you welcome trading horror stories with your friends because it makes you feel normal.

When you’re the mom of teens, threats and bribes become a means of survival.

When you’re the mom of teens, you squint a lot when looking at your kid because, in just the right light, you can see the small child he used to be.

When you’re the mom of teens, you want to cry because of how badly you miss your babies.

When you’re the mom of teens, you want to squeeze them because you DO know what they are going through. But a)they won’t let you and b)they smell.

When you’re the mom of teens, you still love them with the same intensity but you hate them with that same intensity too.

When you’re the mom of teens, you pray a lot that you’ll never be the mom of a teen mom.

When you’re the mom of teens, you now know exactly what your own mother meant when she wished one like yourself on you because you’re wishing one on them.

When you’re the mom of teens, you’re heart still soars when you think of them and then sinks when they open their mouths.

When you’re the mom of teens, running away from home sounds like a great idea…for you.

When you’re the mom of teens, your hanging on for life because it’s the bumpiest, scariest roller-coaster ride on the planet.

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