Shortcuts and Dieting

I hate dieting. We don’t work well together, diets and me. In fact, I’m a diet dropout and a epic failure. It’s one of my things, don’t judge. It’s not that I don’t have willpower because I do. I’m not a big eater or binger. My food choices are usually fairly healthy, unless you put animal crackers or junky candy in front of me. Then I go all weak in the knees, I can’t see straight and I become my inner Cookie Monster. Yeah…it’s a mess.

That doesn’t happen all that often so that’s good.

But, I think my major issue isn’t my food choices but my lack of consistency when it comes to eating. I can go all morning without thinking of food which, as you know, breakfast is “the most important meal of the day”…says all the professionals. Suddenly, I’m crabby, I can’t see straight and my stomach is making louder noises than my dogs when they are barking at squirrel…or blowing leafs…or shadows…but, you get my point.

It’s only then, when I’m a mess, that I realize eating is a necessity.

The cycle continues throughout the day. I mean, yay for me that I’m so busy that it doesn’t leave time to think about feeding Seymour. But, not good for me because my metabolism sucks donkey balls.

Chunky monkey.

So, point being, I’m sick of it. My thyroid has resolved itself so I can’t blame it on that stupid gland or whatever it is anymore. I started smoking back in July when my mom got sick and died…stop glaring at me, I know it’s gross. By the way, my kids know so while I’m still smoking in the garage, it’s with full disclosure. I don’t have to cover up my scent anymore.

A few years ago, I joined this place called Medical Weight Loss. I decided to do their prescription diet. Yup, I went on meds to lose weight. And lose weight I did. It was wonderful. I felt great. It was awesome.

I kept it off for a few years, even when I was done being on the medication. Adipex is what it’s called.

Then, I quit smoking.

Well, those of you who have smoked and then quit, you know what happens. Hello extra weight.

So, here I am. 60 pounds later. Well, give or take a few lbs.

I’ve tried. Seriously. I really have. Diet. Exercise. Sedentary lifestyle. None of it worked.

The 60 pounds, otherwise known as a small child that has distributed itself throughout my body, has because a major cross that I just don’t want to deal with anymore.

I’m sick of shopping in the Plus-Sized Department or trying to find those extra large clothes that fit over my fat arms and fatter butt.

Plus, I have plus sized clothing issues but that is an entirely different blog post that I’m currently working on.

This brings me to today. At precisely 3:30pm.

I joined Medical Weight Loss again. I’m doing drugs again. But, they are prescription and for a good cause…self confidence and health. And for the sake of a new wardrobe, one that I can wear with pride.

So yeah. I’m all about taking short cuts where I can. At my age, weight loss isn’t an easy endeavor. In fact, it’s nearly impossible. For me, anyways.

I’m going on Adipex…or whatever the doctor at the place decides is right for me.

Yes, I’ll be doing a diet. And yes, I’ll try to be more than sedentary. But no, I’m not doing it without meds.

Because I hate dieting and being on a diet pill will make it that much better. And easier.

The end result will be the same anyways, I’ll just be able to get there quicker, almost in time for stuff I have going on this summer.

And no, I’m not quitting smoking. Yet.

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