Once upon a time, when I was a little girl, my parents explained to me how babies were made. I sat and excitedly listened to my parents tell me something about a man putting his penis inside a woman’s vagina. Then, the penis spits and these little spermy dudes are released. The strongest sperm unites with the little egg that is traveling its way down the woman’s insides. And viola…a zygote is made. Then, the zygote turns into an embryo. Then the embryo turns into a fetus. And the fetus, when born, is called an infant.
Then, when I got a little older, I got a little curious. When does this fertilized egg actually become a life.
I asked. The answer I received was…
Once this fertilized egg goes through all the stages, becomes a baby and is able to live outside the mothers womb, it’s a life. Because, if it can’t live outside the womb, it can’t live at all. Unless it spends the rest of its life living in the mothers uterus but then that wouldn’t be very comfortable for anyone. I’d dread the teenage years based on that situation.
For all these years, I thought life began when life COULD begin.
But now, the politicians who seem to know much more than any scientist, doctor or any other knowledgable source…they say that life begins 2 weeks BEFORE conception.
As if.
How the FUCK is that possible? And please forgive the colorful language but I’m exceptionally confused.
So, what these POLITICIANS are saying essentially is this…
My eggs are alive. Without the help of sperm to fertilize them. Sing that to the Sound of Music.
I’m Mary. I am capable of divine conception.
And so…if I’m in Arizona two weeks before I’m fertile and then SUDDENLY I get my period…am I going to get arrested for having a spontaneous abortion if someone finds out? Oh wait, I can try to find the egg in the toilet and then shove it back up to try to incubate it until it becomes…what? What could an egg POSSIBLY become if it’s not fertilized other than a schmutz on a tampon or a plegh in the toilet?
What about sperm? If my eggs are considered life, then so are sperm, right? It’s only fair. But crap, if a guy ejaculated, that would be a mass murder. That would be spermicide on a massive scale. I mean…that’s a few life sentences there.
But this is about women. We aren’t allowed to have any say in our bodies. Politicians are deciding what is best for us and our unhatched eggs. Some of these politicians are women, which is so totally beyond me. How can ANY woman…or man, but it seems they are dumber than women to begin with…think that this is a good idea. How can this have been an ah-ha moment for anyone?
I can picture it. A bunch of old fuddy duddies sitting around a politicians office or courtroom or wherever it is they sit and spew out stupidity…
One of them, in a very educated tone with eyes lighting up announces to the group his/her idea of, what he/she considers to be sheer brilliance…OK, I’m hoping this was a man that decided this because if it was a woman than…well, wow. But wow anyways. And I just realized…it IS a woman sponsoring this bill. I’m going to assume her parents dropped her on the head when she was an egg…er…infant. So, let’s go back to this hypothetical, shall we?
This man/woman with bright ideas and an even brighter light-bulb announces to his/her peers that he/she feels that, based on fertility, a woman is harboring LIFE within her lining shedding womb 2 weeks BEFORE this woman even considers the thought of penetration.
And these other politician folks, here’s hoping they are still all men because…wow…they are looking at each other. They are rubbing their chins and their temples in concentration. They are nodding in agreement. They are all thinking that they like this idea…
These morons…er…politicians that are running a state in our good country decide…UNANIMOUSLY…that INDEED, this woman who is about to have her period and presumably before she’s even had sperm released into her…she is carrying inside her…
LIFE.
WHAT. THE. FUCK?
Morons. The whole lot of them.
Ok, so I get that an egg is the symbol of life on many holidays. This is just taking it a few million steps too far…backwards.
My eggs, and I’m assuming I have a couple of good ones left, considering my advanced age…are RIGHT NOW…as we speak…LIFE.
Because, I’m 2 weeks before when I could conceivably conceive.
I could rant forever. Because none of this makes sense to me.
Maybe I’m missing something?
If life begins 2 weeks BEFORE conception then life as we know it ENDS with politicians.
The sponsor of the bill IS a woman. Seriously. There is SO many things wrong with this.
However, I do have to say that I love what the male representative (also a doctor) had to say – “If medical science can only determine gestational age to within 10-14 days, how can a superior court judge do it?” – Seriously… let’s see a judge tell me exactly when the little sperm met the egg.
UGH.
Julie´s last blog post ..#Drawestin: Amazing drawings…
Omg. Then male voluntary ejaculation should totally be illegal because think of all the little babies going down the shower drain! Silly politicians, they’ve had the wrong target all this time.
The type of bill would make me consider leaving Arizona if I lived there. This politician is not dealing with reality…at least not my reality.
MusingsfromMe/Jill´s last blog post ..#BlogHer by the Brand
I think there is something in the Bible about a man spilling his seed… You never hear them talking about that though. Idiots.
Jennifer´s last blog post ..You vs. You
Which is why the Politics of Religion have no place in the Politics of the Country – and when you peel away all the rhetoric and get the issues down to their underwear, that’s where they stem from – fervently religious zealots willing to impose THEIR way of thinking on everybody else – and they have the money to buy the Political wherewithal to see that it happens.
lceel´s last blog post ..Haiku Friday
First, I want to say that I agree with EVERY SINGLE THING you wrote in this post. Next, I want to say that it’s getting harder and harder to separate the religious views from the financial ones. For example, the recent outcry by the Catholic church leaders (all men, incidentally) regarding the healthcare initiative to provide oral contraceptives to women. This is not about religion – it’s about their (and the insurance companies’) unwillingness to pay the costs of these medications for their female employees (or students, as is the case in the infamous Limbaugh criticism toward Sandra Fluke), many of whom are NOT Catholic (and, I want to point out here that lots of us Catholic women utilize birth control. Duh). Until the average person realizes just how much financial burden and/or monetary compensation influence these “religious” and “ethical” proposals, bills like this will continue to pop up in our legislatures. Really, we must be willing to speak up against these abuses of power. Thanks for doing so today!
Dawn´s last blog post ..Matisyahu and Music
I consider myself a conservative and I also consider myself a Catholic but these types of legislation have got to go and go NOW! I believe that life begins at conception and I have my own views on abortion but I really don’t ever want to see the option of obtaining a legal abortion outlawed. The consequences would be down right dangerous, both to the physical well being of women and their constitutional standing. If bills like this are passed then what is next for women? Will we be forced to take or avoid certain forms of birth control, undergo medical procedures just because we have female reproductive organs, have to report the happenings on our menstrual cycles to the government? The possibilities are endless.
I’m completely over government involvement in my personal affairs. I do not vote for people who insist on setting my moral compass for me.
Jennifer @ Also Known As…the Wife´s last blog post ..Easter