I’ve gotten some weird searches lately that lead people directly to my blog. I’m not sure why. After all, I’m SO appropriate and lady-like.
Aside from the regular searches about things I’m apparently an authority on, such as Duran Duran (duh), fishing hats and mermaids and whales to name a few, I’m apparently the go to for all things that have to do with…
Melissa Summers divorce. Um…I’ve met her once. She seemed like a lovely lady. But, I am not “in the know” when it comes to her divorce. Sorry to disappoint but this isn’t the place where you’ll find that sort of gossip. Try, I dunno, her blog perhaps?
Granny wearing thongs: I don’t even want to picture this. I don’t even want to know why this would be of interest to anyone. And really, I think that grannies wear granny panties, not thongs.
Hate letter to husband: I could help in this department. I’m good at hate letters. Especially to husbands.
Girl kills her college roomate 20 years: Turn yourself in. Seriously. Oh and…stay off my blog.
Little girls nipples: I’m hoping that whomever was searching for this, did not find what they were looking for. Especially on my blog. So…go away. Hide under a rock. You sick, sick, grody person. May your sex organs dry up and fall off.
Spying on parents sex: Is there a reason that you are google searching this? I mean, can’t you just stand outside your parents door? My kids do.
Fornicating with little girl: Dear Sir or Madame, you are sick. Sick. Sick. And someone bigger than you should come step on you.
Where should i fuck if i want a baby: Well, it goes a little something like this…YOUR VAGINA. It’s a good place to start.
Moms porn: really, go look in her nightstand drawer because you won’t find her porn on my blog. I promise.
Naked neighbors: Are you watching in my window?
Show me your tits: If you show me yours first.
Did Justin Bieber lose his virginity: I’ll reckon that, by now, the answer is yes. Isn’t he dating that Disney chick who is older than him? I’m sure she’s showed him the ropes (and maybe some whips, chains and candle wax too).
So, those are just a few of the searches via good old Google that leads wonderful folk to my blog. I’m hoping that the majority of them don’t come back.
What is wrong with people?! Ugh.
So, make me feel better here. Share with me some of the sick searches that lead people to land on your blog.