I used to be able to see Russia from my backyard. OK, so I exaggerate. But damn, I had great vision. When I was stopped at one traffic light, I could read the signs at the other. I could see for miles and miles and miles…
Yeah, not so much anymore.
I really noticed it today when I was trying to read the label on a tube of mascara that was left in the powder room by my daughter. I figured I’d just help myself to hers (she does it all the time with my products and paybacks are bitches, so I hear) and it would save me from running upstairs to use my own.
I looked at the tiny little label on the bottom…one which, it seems like yesterday I would have been able to read instantly…and all I saw were blurry squiggles and lines. And I had to stare and squint to even get that much from it.
The horror.
I used it anyways. I figured that if I couldn’t see the label to know what color it was then it didn’t matter, as long as it wasn’t a neon color.
So, I chalked up my blurred and non-responsive vision to this little virus I seem to have.
But then I realized, this has been in progression for awhile. And i’ve been living in denial. Yeah, I’m one of those women that think they are still 18. So?
Sigh.
I decided, while driving my son to school today, I would test myself. I would show myself that not being able to read tiny print was an isolated incident and probably had something to do with the lack of proper lighting in my house.
I was going to read all the road signs. From a long distance.
I tried. REALLY HARD.
I squinted.
I stared.
I tried to summon some sort of bionic vision.
It was futile.
All I saw were lines that someone with YOUNG vision would recognize as words.
Despite the fact that I was familiar with every single one of those street signs and knew, by heart, what they said.
I couldn’t read them until I came right up on them.
And I tried not to cry over the loss of my fantabulous vision.
Because the tears would make word recognition even worse.
SIgh.
I’m not happy about this aging thing. Not. At. All.
I refuse to wear glasses, just on principle alone. I’m rebelling against myself and my impending and looming old age and bi-focals.
No. Way.
So, I’ll just keep blaming it on my sinuses and the stuff floating in the air, despite the fact that it’s winter and the only thing floating are snow flakes mixed with whatever chemicals are being sprayed into the skies.
Hey, that’s it. Those chemtrails have crap in them that are screwing with my vision. Who can I sue?
Oh, it’s no use. I better face up to what’s going on. Because, as I type this post, I’m squinting to read because the font is so damn small. Don’t you think…it’s really small, right?!
Crap.
Well, I’d better go buy myself a rocking chair, some knitting needles and bi-focals. It’s getting to be about that time.
Sigh.
What’s next? Huh, I can’t hear you…
Bifocals. It’s either that or wear reading glasses over my contacts. I fought it as long as I could; now I just figure they go with the gray streaks in my hair. Ah, well, I’m not getting older, I’m getting – never mind.
Daisy´s last blog post ..Simple Pleasures
I got my first pair of glasses in first grade. Joy of joys I got contacts at age 15, but by then of course my self-esteem was destroyed and to this day when I picture myself in my head I see the gawky kid with the coke-bottle glasses. But I digress.
By the time I was 38 I was back to the coke bottles because they couldn’t make contacts strong enough for me, and at that point my glasses weren’t strong enough anymore either. So my lovely mommy paid for me to get Lasik surgery. It was the biggest miracle of my life, and that includes having kids. Sorry kids. For the first time in my memory, I could open my eyes in the morning and actually see across the room. Of course, for the first couple of months, I still automatically reached for my glasses on the night table. At any rate, they did tell me that once I hit my early forties, that whole age thing would kick in as the muscles in the eye gave way, and the lasik doesn’t correct that. I got a few extra years but I did have to get bifocals in the summer. I use them for reading and driving if I need to read road signs (we don’t have that many of those – seriously), but I can’t walk around in them. I ended up buying a cheap pair of reading glasses from Walmart, and that’s what I use in the house for reading labels and some of my books. (Suddenly I’ve become a big fan of the large print books at the library.)
So that’s what I’d suggest first – buy the cheap reading glasses – they come in festive colors and won’t cost a mortgage payment.
Janet´s last blog post ..The Ghosts of New Years Present
I have no idea what you’re talking about.. wait this is the DMV website right?
isn’t it awful? Just the other day I was trying to read instructions for my son’s new card game and had to admit I couldn’t see letters. I don’t know what upset me more, the fact that it was so hard to read, or the knowledge that straining my eyes was a precursor to lines and wrinkles. Never thought I’d say this… but Botox is starting to look desireable.
julie´s last blog post ..Mom Chic- Snow Boots for under 100
I’m sending you a new housecoat and slippers… 🙂
Colleen – Mommy Always Wins´s last blog post ..Mmmmmciiiiderrrrrr
haha you sound like my husband…for a couple of years, i told him he couldn’t see well & that he probably needed glasses. he was like, ‘no, i’m fine.’ he finally broke down last year & visited the eye doctor…he needed bifocals. lol now he drives like an old man…i didn’t know needing bifocals meant you suddenly turned into a 90 yr old man on the road. :o/ lol i have been wearing glasses for years, but my prescription (which is low powered actually) has pretty much stayed the same until after i turned 40. while the distance prescription didn’t change (except a little this past yr), i had problems with seeing things close-up. when the dr. told me i need bifocals, i just said, ‘what?’ lol he said that happens when you get in your 40s.
ciara´s last blog post ..Roadtrip- Vegas to Burbank-Part 1
My eyes have been screwed up since I was a kid but got really bad when I had kids. I gave in a few years ago. Now I have 2 prescriptions. Bifocals are out of the question because of stupid astigmatism. My body isn’t inclined to keep things easy. Two completely different Rx that cannot be combined, ever. I hate my eyes.
mamikaze´s last blog post ..blog- meet microblogs- tumblr sites- this is wordpress
I remember the days when I could see well. At least I still have great hearing and the sense of smell of a drug dog. Plus, I have really cute glasses now.
Christina @RantRaveRoll´s last blog post ..GIVEAWAY THE ONLY THING BETTER THAN EATING COOKIES- IS SHARING COOKIES
Oh my goodness! Me too! My kids all have glasses (starting around age 9) but me? Great eyes. I KNOW I need to have my eyes rechecked. I KNOW I am going to need glasses, but I totally don’t want to go!
Lolli @ Better in Bulk´s last blog post ..The Man in the Sand – PSF
I can’t see either. At least, not close up. I look my dad holding the paper out just so I can read it. I used to have perfect vision. Forty plus years later? Not so much.
Don’t look at it as “aging” – look at it as the ability to add a new fashion accessory to your wardrobe! There are some beautiful glasses out there now – unlike when I was a kid and had to wear them.
Gigi´s last blog post ..The Bastardization of American Literature
My eyes started going around 42. It was so subtle at first I attributed it to late-night shifts and eye strain. In 2009 I broke down and got progressive lenses. They’ve made my life a lot better although I’m still not adjusted to having glasses on my face.
MomZombie´s last blog post ..Going to California