I don’t care what anyone says, boys are WAY more difficult than girls. True story.
Girls have big mouths and bad attitudes. They can be a royal whiny pain in the ass. Their drama, it seems, is limited to the OMG’ing about the boys in their school and whichever “Team” they choose. In our house, we have a Team Jacob and a Team Edward. What a war. The amount of growling, gnashing of bared teeth and foam flying over who is hotter is ridiculous. I don’t know, would I rather be destined to a life of blood sucking or get ripped apart by a werewolf? Hmmm? Although, Edward is far too skinny, I’d have to fatten him up or I’d scrunch him if I was on top…
Girls are also, of course, catty. Something that isn’t really outgrown, ever. Not saying that I am but Holy Hell, did you see how short that woman’s skirt was, isn’t she way too old and wrinkly to be wearing shit like that, doesn’t she have any idea that she isn’t a teenager anymore.
There are clothing wars. Hair product wars. Make up wars. Whose boyfriend is cuter war. Who is most popular war.
That is the extent of the girl drama issues. They are SO much easier. Because really? Hello simple. Except when you are trying to explain to a teen that she better NOT go after another girls boyfriend because no way does she ever want to be known as the boyfriend thief. EVER.
But boys?
Talk about drama.
When they are little, they are more emotional and attached to their Mommy. Which, isn’t that big of a deal, in fact, it’s quite sweet. Until they hit school age and put on quite the Academy Award winning performance during drop off. And you’re looking around at all the other kids who have been dropped off effortlessly without clinging to the leg of their Mommy and have no pipes that burst, exploding water down their faces along with a screechy, high pitched crying.
No amount of Calgon will take you away. None.
And then these sweet boys who love their Mommies? They eventually outgrow the display and have a bunch of awards on their shelf, commending their outstanding dramatic performances.
But…they are flunking out of Algebra and Earth Science because, even though their homework is done and is put away in a folder (maybe not the appropriate one, but hey, at least it’s put away) they “forgot” to turn it in. Or, they are not sure why the teacher didn’t give them credit for it because ” I swear to G-D, I showed it to him.”
Of course, I believe my once-cling-on child. Because he looks at me with his big blue eyes and produces from somewhere deep within the bottomless pit of his backpack, his neat (although a little wrinkled) and COMPLETE assignments, proving to me that he isn’t lying and that his teachers are out to get him.
Right? I mean, aren’t all the teachers out to get the kids? Yeah, I thought so.
Forget little drama with bigger boys. It’s more like EPIC SAGAS.
Boys are more emotional messes. Probably because they are bigger and smellier than girls. Seriously, have you ever caught a whiff of a boys gym shoe? You could kill a small village with just one pair of gyms shoes that were left in the rain. No kidding. I don’t know why scientists don’t experiment with some sort of odor warfare using gym shoes.
With girls, you give them a mascara and tell them how pretty they are and they are happy, skipping around the house singing the latest Lady Gaga song…or wait, is that me? Hmmm…
Or, you buy them a new shirt, only if it’s skin tight, and they can spend hours in front of the mirror checking out how their boobs look in it. Only after their homework is done and put away neatly in the appropriate folder.
Boys.
I have no clue what to do with them.
But holy shit, do I love my boys. (And my girls, too…DUH. But this post is about how difficult boys are).
Then, they grow into men. Bigger drama, bigger stinks, bigger um…never mind.
And we girls marry them.
*Eye roll*
omg, I JUST had a thought. What if it’s JUST MY BOYS? And everyone else on the planet has not one single issue with their child.
TELL ME IT’S NOT JUST ME!!!
I totally agree. My son is WAY more difficult than my daughter.
Michelle @ Mommy Loves Stilettos´s last blog post ..Oh No I Didnt
My boy is still the little huggable, loveable, sweet, all about the mommy kisses age. Surely he will not grow into a boy like that. Never.
Right?!
Jennifer´s last blog post ..Life as a little brother
Our daughter was always much more self-sufficient than her younger brother. Don’t know if that can be attributed to her gender or birth order.
She’s had more drama, but tended to deal with it herself. The Boy… omg… he could win an Emmy, Oscar and Tony for his drama performances, and he draws everyone into that drama.
My girl was much easier than my boy.
Tara R.´s last blog post ..Hush- hush…
I’m not listening!!!! Lalaaaaaalaaaaaaallllaaaa… My boys are sweet and smell delicious and I refuse to believe a thing you say.
I don’t have any kids, but I do remember being little, and I totally agree – boys have much more drama.
‘Cause girls get their drama out.
But boy drama, now that’s something to be seen.
My boys are almost 7 and 9 and still pretty easy. Except for the scatological humor. That might be the end of me.
My boys are perfect, like Mary Poppins, in every way.
(disclaimer: that’s a lie.)
Stefanie´s last blog post ..live in yesterday – a key to parenting today
Oh PLEASE don’t say it’s so.
I have a 5 month old baby boy, and I have always been told that boys are easier. But oh man, I am excited/nervous for him to grow older.
Just found your blog and love it!
You know, I was so happy when I gave birth to that sweet little boy. No drama for me, I thought.
Yeah, right. I know what you speak of regarding homework, etc. And hormones? Right about the age of 12 or 13 – they absolutely explode and that sweet little boy? Yeah, he can make a girl who’s in the throes of PMS look like an angel!!! Luckily, this seems to have leveled out a bit – because there was no way I could have dealt with that much longer…..
Gigi´s last blog post ..The One that Makes Me Sound Like a Bad Wife and Mother
This may or may not have given me a semi panic attack. My 6yo is perfect and sweet for life dammit.
Maria @BOREDmommy´s last blog post ..Daddy Has Too Much Time On His Hands
It’s just you. My boys are perfect (nope, no sarcasm there at all).
My first boy, who is now 12, was pretty much a walk in the park. Still is. He’s totally a square. Fine by me.
My 8yo boy, WOW. He is an emotional mess. And a mama’s boy. Melodramatics.
The girl is only 2 but OMG if she doesn’t have the worst mood swings! For real. I’m scared.
I only have two boys and no girls so I haven’t been able to compare, but my oldest son is slowly but steadily driving me to an early grave. He is uptight, aggressive, clingy, talkative, and too smart for his own damn good. Then my youngest son is sensitive, a mama’s boy, cries when his feelings get hurt, and screams bloody murder when he doesn’t get his way. Yikes. Might as well be girls, as far as I’m concerned.
Alexis´s last blog post ..you can just call me cafe con leche
I only have one boy, but compared to my sister’s daughter, he’s a very low-maintenance child. AND at 17, still loves his mommy. đŸ™‚
THANK YOU!!! I have been telling everyone I know this for years. You forgot to mention (or maybe it has not happened to you yet) how unyielding to discipline they are, you can not get them to do what they don’t want to, really you need their Dad’s for this. It is quite intimidating to be yelling at a full grown boy (twice my size, and really a man) looking up and trying to pretend that you are the boss! My girls aren’t perfect, but they are still intimidated by me and the thought of being in trouble, unlike my boys who think I am cute and funny when I am mad!
One more reason I am happy I have a girl. I mean, she’s crazy, but at least its a crazy I understand.
Carabee´s last blog post ..Generations
Umm…hmmm. Do you mean the drama of the 2 & 4 year old set actually increases and amplifies over time? Not cool, Melissa. Not effing cool.
Kami´s last blog post ..This Awesome Life
It is perspective because I think that the exact opposite is true. Girls have more drama, more issues and more nonsense to deal with. I can glower at the boys. I can walk up and talk in a near whisper and maintain their attention the entire time.
Girls have bigger attitudes and are far better at manipulating than boys are. Boys get into simple trouble, girls, well…
Jack´s last blog post ..I got my ass kicked at Dancing With The Stars