Every year since I started blogging, I’ve written about my oldest son and his emotional issues with school. The heartache that he has which transfers onto me, of course. I’m his Mom. The frustrations he is not good as handling. His seasonal mood disorder (happy summer, miserable spring, fall and winter).
We are three days into the new school year, if you don’t count yesterday. He didn’t go to school due to Rosh Hashana. We are already starting to see a change in his personality from the laid back, happy 14 year old that hung out with his friends all summer to a sullen, brooding, depressed teen.
Because of a class.
He entered his freshman year of high school (I can’t believe my baby is in high school). Which, as we all know, is way, WAY different from elementary and middle schools. Especially in a school as heavily populated as the one he attends. It’s not as sheltered or nurturing. There are classes mixed with all grades. The puppies are thrown in with the lions.
He is beyond miserable because of this. BEYOND.
It’s his Spanish class. There are mostly seniors. For a shy, insecure 9th grader, this is the worst possible case scenario. Especially when he has been told how horrible seniors are. It’s causing him to be a nervous, unhappy wreck.
I had thought he matured over the summer. The way he acted, I thought we were going to be over his typical school year angst and moodiness. I hoped beyond hope.
It seems that we aren’t and this year, he started early. Sleep already isn’t coming easily for either of us. Worrying doesn’t make for good sleeping.
I’ve already contacted his counselor via email and voicemail. I’m hoping she gets back to me immediately. But one troubled freshman might be the least of their concerns. One of my biggest concerns, something so important and dire to me, in a school of this size, it probably a insignificant fleck on their radar.
I’m hoping I’m wrong.
I hope we are able to nip this particular and easily remedied problem in the proverbial bud. Although, with him, I’m sure there are more to come.
High school isn’t a time to mess around. There isn’t room to get turned off due to frustration. These next four years count, big time! I don’t know how to reach him, to make him understand. I don’t know anyone who has ever been able to reach him and make an impact, except the school Social Worker that spoke with him last year.
I think there is only so much that I can and should do for him, now that he is in high school. The babying and coddling and perhaps, enabling, should be at a minimum. Even though my heart wants to wrap itself around him and protect him.
I set the ball in motion by contacting the counselor. Hopefully she’ll call him to the office. I am thinking of calling the social worker who I believe is also at the high school.
What else? What more?
He is 14.
When will he grow out of this?
I don’t think I can stand another four years of this.