Unexplained weight gain.
Worsening of PMS.
Stress and extreme fatigue.
My list of symptoms, which I consulted Dr. Google and Dr. WebMD about. They discussed it amongst themselves and came back at me with a diagnosis.
PERI. FREAKING. MENOPAUSE.
Every single symptom I have was listed in every single symptom list I read. Which means, my change…it’s a comin’.
Assuming the two good doctors are right.
It got me all nostalgic-like.
I remember the day I got my period. 6th grade. November.
I remember the horrible cramps and breast tenderness and living on Tylenol for a couple of days, every month.
I remember those awkward maxi pads that I was worried about bleeding through or around.
I remember when my friend first taught me to use a tampon, during summer camp…Cape Hatteras, NC.
I remember counting the days from my last period, hoping I wasn’t pregnant.
I remember counting the days from the first day of my period, in hopes of getting pregnant.
I remember being done having babies and not wanting this monthly visitor anymore.
Here I am, 41 years old and the end is slowly becoming a reality.
I know that it’s still years away.
Realistically, I have no use for eggs and the mess that comes along with it. I’m done reproducing, for sure.
But, I’m not ready for this. Not really.
I’m not ready for dry skin and dry nether region.
I’m not ready for all the health problems like osteoporosis and heart disease that are well known side effects.
I’m not ready to grow old.
Peri-Menopause and all the shit that happens during and after it…
It’s better than the other diagnosis that Dr. Google and Dr. WebMD have come up with…
So bring on the change, I guess. I’ll just stock up on AstroGlide and Estrogen.
It’s better than the alternative.