Knowing When To Shut Up

I guess it’s time I address the Detroit Free Press article that was written about me and spilling too much on blogs. Because, we had a little “incident” in our family due to the fact that a friend of my daughters’ decided to read Rock and Drool.

I can’t keep people I don’t want on my blog, particularly friends of my kids and some family, from reading. Despite the fact that my content is most suitable for those 18 and over and not related to me. Blogs become public when we decide to post our content as public. And I do. It is open to the entire world, as long as they have access to a computer.

I said in that Free Press article that I am an open book on my blog. I write about everything that happens in my life and what I see fit to write about…but, within reason. Not because I’m looking for attention or to give shock value. Usually, it’s out of a need. I must get it off my chest. I need to find out if anyone else is experiencing what I am or has in the past. And I look for support…what to do. Sometimes, I just have a funny story to tell and it might include some raunchy or unsavory facts about me. But I never delve too deeply into issues where I should worry that a minute fact will come back and bite me or my children in the ass.

Which leads me to very recently. My 6th grade daughter has this girl friend, who shall remain nameless. As I mentioned earlier, this kid decided to peruse my blog. And she found out a juicy tid-bit of info about me, or one that she deemed gossip-worthy. So, she marched right up to my 8th grade daughter who was surrounded by a bunch of her friends and excitedly announced aloud what she had discovered about me in my blog. The fact of the matter is, it’s a no big deal thing. But still, my daughter was shocked and mortified because she wasn’t expecting it, least of all from her sisters friend. And honestly, you are so lucky that my daughters knee jerk reaction wasn’t to backhand you.

So now, I’m going to address this girl. She knows who she is. And I know that she is on my blog…

Remember when you went to that birthday party and your “friend” announced in a very loud whisper to all the girls a private fact about you that you were trying to keep secret? Remember how you felt? You wanted the floor to open up and swallow you. And remember when she announced it again in school to the rest of your peers? And you felt like crap and were completely humiliated. Everyone knew your secret.

Hold on to that feeling for the rest of your life. And learn to keep your mouth shut.

It’s fine if you want to read my blog. I can’t stop you. But if you are really my daughters friend then learn to behave like one. What you did was mean and you did EXACTLY what was done to you only…to my child. You acted very much like that girl that you don’t like. And if you want to be thought of in the same light, then by all means, continue using your poor judgement. Personally, I have more faith in you than that. You are a nice, sweet, smart person. Act like it.

What I learned from this mini fiasco? It can be the most innocuous fact about you that someone who is malicious will dig up and fling around like they own it. It’s really not about revealing too much because honestly, I don’t think I do. It’s about what seems completely harmless and benign to one person is horrifying to another. Also, someone will always find something to use against you when it’s out there for the world to scrutinize. It’s going to happen, it’s par for the course of life. But when the backstabber is someone who is considered a friend, that’s when the problems start for all involved.

If you can’t read my blog and respect our family, then keep off.

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