After my second tantrum (or third) of the day. No, actually, of the morning, seeing as, it’s just barely the afternoon. I hung up the phone, although pressing end on a cellular call doesn’t make as much of an impact as being able to slam the phone down on the hook. BUT. I got rid of my husband who was yelling at me as I was yelling at him. Yeah, it’s been that kind of day already. Another sick kid home. This kid can’t be left alone due to some emotional issues, so I couldn’t go in to work. Keep in mind, I had already been home for over a week with my youngest son who had the flu.
I headed over to Twitter to find friends to chat with so I could calm down. And, perhaps find a few good blog posts to read. Coincidentally, a blogger whose blog I’ve never read before called The Ohana Mama posted a link to her Momversation post that included Jessica, Finslippy and another blogger. They were discussing having Mommy Tantrums.
I got so excited. Because doooooood…helloo!! I have them. All. The. Time. Not only that but, I’m presently in the throes of one doozy whooping mother of a Mommy tantrum!
It’s so NOT uncommon in my house for me to have a Mommy tantrum! Yelling. Screaming. Slamming doors. Throwing things…soft, of course. And not AT anyone. Except maybe my husband.
One HUGE thorn in my side cause of my having a screaming fit is over dinner. When the brats decide that they don’t like what I’ve made. And they sit at the table, whining about the hunger pangs. Despite the fact that there is a perfectly delish dinner, steaming hot in front of them.
Pisses me right off.
I’ve been known to go into the garage, which is through the kitchen, and scream. Loudly.
Or, how about finally, break is over. The kid that had been sick for over a week…is healthy again and will be going back to school. I am healthy again, after being sick for days. And the day all the kids are supposed to go back to school…
And the highest maintenance kid is home sick.
What else is there to do besides send threatening texts and emails to my husbands cell phone. Call my mother constantly, whining and screaming to her about how unfair life is and how badly you want to run away.
Or how about when every single kid in the house is saying a different variation of my name. All at once?! And they all want m to answer them. All at once. And the only thing I can do is SCREAM, shrilly, telling them all to shut their fricking mouths and the next one to say my name is going to get a mouth FULL of pepper. Because today, your name is a bad word worthy of having their mouths washed out.
How about this? When my husband, after playing poker every weekend…with a major losing streak, every weekend…tells me Thursday that he is having cards at our house on Friday. Not to mention that I am so sick of him playing poker. Plus, I don’t like when it’s at our house because of how late it lasts and it keeps the kids up late. Making my work as a Mommy go into double overtime on a Friday night. Because the kids refuse to settle down and go to bed, leaving me to blog and Twitter. At least I have Twitter! When really? Friday night, late night, should be WAY past quittin time and a quarter to lovin’ time…hubba hubba.
I don’t know about you but…I get FUMING mad. I cross my arms over my chest and don’t lift a finger to help clean up the dining room table where the cards will be played. I smugly look at the mess of laundry that covers the wood top. I think to myself…FUCK HIM.
And I go off and slam the door to the bathroom.
My family witnesses my having conniption fits and tantrums.
My kids know that Mommy gets mad. They know that, no matter what, Mommy gets over being mad and still hugs, kisses and loves them. Even if they are the ones that made me angry.
They also know that Daddy has tantrums also. And boy, does he ever. But, like Mommy, they know he loves them always and forever too. Regardless of how mad he was.
Kids can’t be completely and utterly sheltered and coddled. Because then, they grow up and have unrealistic visions of relationships and behavior.
Children need to be aware of the human side of their parents. Well…within reason. It’s one thing for them to see tantrums. It’s completely another for them to see, say…what goes on behind closed and padlocked doors when the parents are making up after the tantrums…
Sarah, Ohana Mama says
First – you’ve never read Ohana Mama?! What?! GIRL! j/k 😉
Second, dude, we all have them but noone talks about them. My kids have seen mama have a tizzy, or two, or three or four, hell, it happens quite frequently to be honest. But we have tons of love too…yup, we’ve got it ALL…all the colors of the emotional rainbow grace our house 🙂
when all else fails…breathe-breathe-breathe….
.-= Sarah, Ohana Mama´s last blog ..Mommy Tantrums? Who Me?! =-.
I have tantrums all the time too and am so upset I missed the discussion— but so glad to be able to catch up on it here on your blog.
.-= complicatedmama´s last blog ..Have you seen my rose colored glasses? =-.
Christina @RantRaveRoll says
I’m a tantrum mom too! I’m a door slamming, revolting, going on strike, screaming, follow you down the hallway and out the door kinda girl.
Did I mention you are not alone?
.-= Christina @RantRaveRoll´s last blog ..POST HOLIDAY RANDOMNESS =-.
OMG! I can’t tell you how good it feels to read this! I’m sorry that you are forced to have mommy tantrums… but I seriously thought that I was a horrible mom and that I was one of the only moms who does this. I hope you find some peace today! 🙂
.-= Jennfer´s last blog ..Beauty =-.
I was in the middle of a mommy tantrum tonight when I retreated to my room to VENT and tweet! UGH… this was such a good read. I feel better now, as I shove Mac and cheese down my picky friggin kids throats because they wouldnt eat what I cooked! Thankfully I have a teenager who likes to cook some simple stuff for the picky other two!! You go GIRL!!
.-= Jenn´s last blog ..Monday Mingle 11/30 =-.
The Only Girl says
So THAT’S what it’s called when I get mad and crazy at them! Thank you for finally giving it a name. I actually had one tonight. And then they asked “are you going to blog about this”. And so I just might. Just to piss them off like they pissed me off (sticking my tongue out immaturely).
I feel so liberated knowing I’m not alone.
What makes me feel better when I am having a perfectly acceptable Mommy tantrum is to think of one of my favorite movies, Mommy Dearest, when Faye Dunaway is pruning the roses. And I think, “I’m not half so bad as HER.”
.-= Nicole´s last blog ..The horrifying, jaw-droppingly disgraceful thing I did at my high school reunion =-.
Oh mommy has tantrums over here. I end up in time out. I find myself starting to yell and I just retreat to my room. Or I put on headphones and pretend I can’t hear them.
I’m so mature, you know?
.-= Jill´s last blog ..Daddy’s Little Girl =-.
Tara R. says
Maybe I need to have more tantrums and not let them build up. They might not be so scary that way.
.-= Tara R.´s last blog ..Holiday Cookie Exchange 2009 =-.
The Ranting Mommy says
Just one MORE example of how we must be blood-related somehow! I have vowed to stop the mommy tantrums. But alas, I haven’t. *sigh* As always, it is refreshing to read moms freeing up the rest of us to face our mutual parenthood woes!!! Thanks!
I run away. That’s how I cope. I get in the car and I go somewhere. I run on my favorite trail or actually go to the gym… I shop or just go to the mall and have a cinnabon…
.-= Kelly@Childhood´s last blog ..Grouchy, Hungry, Thirsty? She’s Three. No… She’s Diabetic. =-.
Whiney Momma says
Well it sounds like you’ve had it up to here *pointing to moon* – no seriously, it is good that you share anger. People get mad, it’s all part of life. We have been working on the yelling and slamming at our place just because I crave calm environments but it doesn’t always work that well. Time outs are the best solution though, even if it means hidiing out in the bathroom sipping a little glass of wine.
.-= Whiney Momma´s last blog ..Whiney’s case against the pregnancy myths =-.
The Retired One says
People are so different, aren’t they? In the whole 37+ years that we have been married, we have never raised our voices with each other. Not once. We have been mad (of course) but when we get mad, we just separate ourselves from each other for a while until we can cool down and talk about it. I don’t think our kids ever witnessed a fight. And they aren’t yellers either…
They aren’t pushovers, they are very assertive to their significant others, but they don’t yell either.
My folks would have some “words” but really didn’t scream at each other either, and neither did my husband’s parents…so it must be that we just didn’t see that kind of thing.
It would make me nervous! ha
.-= The Retired One´s last blog ..Travel Observations =-.