I’ve been doing a TON of research on Google today about 2012. Fine, maybe not a ton. Just a little bit. Why? Because my ex-husband scares the shit out of me, that’s why.
For a couple years now, he has been preaching to everyone who will listen to him(which really, isn’t many because everyone tunes him out and labels him a loon) about all this shit that is going to hit the fan. He has been doing some “research” on Google to support all his paranoid predictions. And let me tell you, all the crazies in the world hang out on Google and Youtube, researching insane stuff like this. Except for us bloggers, of course. We just hang out on Twitter posting cute videos and cool links.
He claims that all movies are telling us about the collapse of the world. With wide eyes and frantic hands, he rants about concentration camps being built within the U.S and it’s not just the Jews that are going to be placed in these. He goes on and on about aliens walking amongst us, and I’m not talking about people from other countries. He tells tall tales of HAART controlling our weather. He is sure that the Free Masons are up to no good and we are all doomed. And convincingly relays to us global economic catastrophes causing the greatest depression in 2012.
Is he nuts? I like to think he needs to be on medication for paranoid delusions.
But. I went on Twitter yesterday to announce that my ex-husband is a whack job because of paranoia about doomsday 2012. And someone told me to Google George Celente.
I did. And I must admit, I had nightmares last night. Horrific ones. I’m not going to go into detail but…wowzers.
Long story short. This George dude is a trend tracker. He allegedly predicted the stock market crash of 1987 up to this whole Madoff Ponzi shit. He…this Mr. Celente…claims that in 2012, we will have a crash unprecedented by any other crash. Economic collapse unlike anything anyone has ever seen before. He also claims that in 2012, our main concern will be feeding our families because there will be a food war.
But then. If you Google 2012. There are so many predictions about that year. Starting, of course, with that crazy Mayan end of the world prediction. Earthquakes, tsunamis, fire shooting out of the sky. Every natural disaster you can think of. In one fail swoop.
I’m just hoping it’s quick and painless.
There is the Timewave Zero and the iChing predictions which say something about some sort of “singularity of infinite complexity” in 2012. At which point, “anything and everything imaginable will occur instantaneously”. Thank you, wikipedia. Another great source of viable and dependable information.
That’s all fine and dandy. If you can even understand what that means. Quite honestly, if I don’t get what this is saying, it can’t happen, So, we’re safe.
Then we have Polar shifts and massive solar flares predicted for December 21, 2012. Just like that movie with Nicolas Cage, Premonition, I think it was called. A ridiculous movie.
We also have Planet Nibiru colliding with the Earth, obviously between planets colliding and solar flares, we can expect some delays in traffic and very warm weather.
Then there is Planet X coming back into orbit which will disrupt our Solar System…causing a major global and intergalactic catastrophe. And obviously, there is no way to survive something like that. Especially if we mix it with complete economic collapse, earthquakes, solar flares, food wars, nuclear war, web bot projects, planets crashing into us.
And really? I didn’t know there was a Planet X or Nibiru in existence. I did know that one of our planets isn’t a planet anymore though. Except, it doesn’t matter which one if we are all about to smash into each other. We’ll all be space particles, stars and asteroids anyways.
Then, of course, we have Obamageddon.
All of these events that will cause the world to end. They are predicted for December 21, 2012.
That’s a LOT of shit happening on one day.
So please, someone, remind me to change my underwear that day. Assuming I was allowed to bring any when I was taken to the concentration camps. OK?
Oh dang. I’m also going to have to make sure to schedule my son’s 9th birthday party, which is December 23, 2012, for the week before all this stuff happens. He shouldn’t get screwed out of a birthday party, right?! I mean, it’s not his fault all this crap is going to happen…