When I first left my ex-husband, I moved my children and myself into this very lovely apartment complex. The actual apartment I lived in was in an ideal location within the apartment complex, which was next to the playscape. The kids loved it because of it’s proximity and the fact that it lured more kids from the surrounding buildings. It was ideal. Noisy. Fun. Kids to play with. PERFECT.
Except.
My sliding glass door. The largest window in the apartment, of course, faced the condo complex behind me.
And my apartment was directly in line with a particular condo, which turned out to be my best friends parents best friends.
I’ll call them…Syd and Nancy.
Let’s just say, I saw way more of Syd than I did Nancy. And I guarantee…I saw way more of Syd than my friends parents did.
I referred to him as my naked neighbor.
I made jokes about him.
All my friends knew about him.
He became a sort of…inside joke.
Then…
I moved. To a condo down the street.
Where I faced another condo complex.
And holy shit. I had another naked neighbor.
Actually, this condo had two naked men and a sometimes naked woman.
I began to question people and their false sense of privacy. Like, who in the HELL would walk around, BUTT FRICKING NAKED with every curtain and blind in the house, gaping open for the world to see?
I’m thinking…stupid people. Clueless people. Tacky. Nudists.
Every negative thing I could think of.
Then…
I got married.
And I moved in with him.
Things were and still are…
Pretty darn good.
Except.
For the fact.
That I. Am now.
Married to the local NAKED NEIGHBOR.
*slaps self in head*
LOL! I just love this story! Perfect timing too…I needed a laugh! Thank you! 🙂
Haha! I tell my kids that the day the are off to college I’m becoming a nudist. They’d better learn to call before coming over!
Well, I can top that one. My oldest daughter’s bedroom window faces the neighbor’s living room window. When neighbor divorced and started tomcatting around he brought many a fine young thing back to his lair. And those fine young things had no problem taking it all off and splaying themselves on his couch — right in front of the window facing my daughter’s bedroom. Sometimes the tomcat couldn’t help himself and shed his outer layers as well. Then —– you guessed it —- right in front of the uncurtained window. Needless to say we made a trip to Bed, Bath and Beyond and bought some very thick and heavy drapes for the daughter’s window.
LOL!!!!
I’m going to keep all other comments to myself because I actually know you both and might need to be able to look you both in the eyes if I’m ever over at your place again…
I guess I’m the nudist in our house. If it weren’t for the kids I’d walk around buck nekkid all the time.
I’m the resident nudist. My daughter has more clothes on than me most of the time.
bwahahahahahahaaa…
fortunately, wonderhubby has a little self-control about that kind of thing. roo-girl would DIE.
woo-hoo! I don’t go around naked in the house, mainly because I’m afraid of being seen. So I could never be someone;s naked neighbour. The neighbour in inderwear, tops 😉
Ha!!! I don’t think I’ve ever had a naked neighbour. But, I’ve probably been a naked neighbour with a false sense that those walking by, like, on the street, couldn’t see me. But, I sort of, for some reason (maybe since having kids), don’t care. But, I wouldn’t want to HAVE a naked neighbour, no. Because — awkward!
Our apartment in Brasil was right across from a naked neighbour. The husband’s friend (of course dragging the husband into it himself – although I’m not sure how much dragging was actually required) would often be found gazing out of our window.
Lucikly neither of them went and married her. She seemed to have rather a lot of partners in that window!
bwahahahahaha!!!!
We are the naked neighbors, but in order to see us walking around naked, you’d need binoculars. And only in winter when the leaves are off the trees, and I don’t walk around naked then because we keep the house at 68, and I’m not taking my clothes off in 68 degrees. So never mind.
sorry to say, I am also the naked neighbor.
Nia gets the naked neighbor award around here. I’m so worried about her “nudist behavior”, that sometimes I think I’m raising a future burlesque dancer, LOL.
No! Seriously, I think I am.
Have you ever thought about installing those special windows that you can see OUT but no one can see IN?