I was eavesdropping and interrupting talking to Anissa briefly on Twitter. She was talking about blog traffic…and quality vs. quantity-type things. And…I told her that I have a lot to say on this. Because of all the blog traffic sites I have signed up for over the last year…
I started blogging 2 years ago. Because really, I was looking for a way to make some money. My sisters sil told me about some blogs that were making a decent income from advertisers. And I thought, without realizing the truth, why the hell not. Sounds easy peasy. As we say on Twitter…#snort.
I started a blog called Such Simple Pleasures (which had to be shut down for reasons I’m not going to get into right now). I figured, I can write. With five kids, there will always be TONS of material to write about. So hello. Let’s do it *cue in Ton Loc*
I did a little bit of research. Ended up hanging out on BlogCatalog and Cre8buzz. And within a month or so, I was getting a large volume of traffic.
Comment love was lavished upon me.
It was only a matter of time before the money would start rolling in…hopefully. Fingers crossed.
I was a blogger on the rise.
A rise to what, I dunno. But…whatever.
Then. My rise came to a screeching halt.
Crashed. Burned. Thanks to family trolls.
I closed shop.
And here I ran.
Rocking and Drooling. A few weeks later. .
I did more research this time.
I took it slower.
I was very protective of Rock and Drool.
I had to be.
Then, I completed the sign ups for StumbleUpon, Technorati, Digg…and various other sites like these. Because I hadn’t REALLY done them before.
I put the entrecard calling card on my blog. And I even dropped on occasion.
I signed up for SITgirls…which, I happen to really love.
I started a new facebook account, just so I could list my blog without worrying about people finding it that I didn’t want finding it.
I Plurked.
I did everything I could. To ensure traffic.
I WANTED NUMBERS.
I put my blog out there. Desperately. Despairingly.
I wanted to look on sitemeter. I wanted to look on Google Analytics. And feedburner. And watch my numbers rise. It was kind of a turn on.
Because, if my numbers rose. My chance of sponsorship would rise.
Because, if my hits rose. My blog might have a chance of pulling itself out of obscurity. And it might finally get noticed. The way Such Simple Pleasures was starting to get noticed.
Because, you know what, it should?! Right?! Shouldn’t we all have our moment of bloggy glory? And shouldn’t we all make money doing something we obsessively adore?
But then…
I realized something.
All those sites. The Technorati. The StumbleUpon. The Entrecard. Condron.
All of them.
Were only good for one thing.
Traffic.
No comments.
No friendships.
Just faceless people with blogs. Who were looking for the same thing I was.
TRAFFIC.
And I wanted more than that.
I wanted the comradery.
I wanted COMMENTS. Because yes, I’m a self proclaimed comment whore. I dare one of you to tell me you aren’t.
I wanted the quality. NOT the quantity. Along with comments 🙂
I started equating blogging to friendships. Well, my kind of friendships.
When I was younger, I thought the more, the merrier.
But now, as an adult…
I have a few really close and dear friends.
And I realized, that is what I wanted from my blog.
Close. And dear.
Numbers.
Faceless.
Hits.
Didn’t matter…
Not as much.
I still welcome them.
But I want them to come back. Because they like what they see.
If they don’t. *shrugs shoulders*
So I stopped doing all of those “other” things.
And I started hanging out at Twitter, mostly.
And doing my SITS roll call.
Because THAT is where the quality hang out.
And occasionally, I check out my reviews and my favorites on Link Referral, when I remember about that place.
But Twitter.
The one place you love to hate and hate to love.
There.
Is where the quality is.
My comradery.
My closeness.
It happened.
And I stopped worrying so much about how many.
And although I would still like to get paid to blog…because really, how cool would that be!?
I stopped worrying about making an income from my blog.
And I began worrying more about my writing.
And my creativity.
And keeping it fresh. And real.
Quality.
And that…
Is what really matters.
Because it shows.
And THAT…
Is how you KEEP quality bloggy friends.
Versus the quantity of faceless bloggers who pass through without ever saying hello. Without ever coming back.
Isn’t THAT what *this* is about?
Brava! 45 days and I get to squeeze on you for reals! Yours was one of my first ‘must-read’ blogs and continues to be on my ‘go to first’ list.
*Applause!* I couldn’t agree more. All I care about it comments & the connections I’ve made. Love it!
Yup! That about covers it!
And another thing, why the hell isn’t ANYBODY up right now? It’s 2-freakin-30 in the a.m. and Twitter is DEAD. I wish the skunk that let loose at 1 a.m. could have done it about 2 hours before that when people were UP. 🙂
Anyway, GREAT POST!
That is one helluva journey. I had no idea.
And really, are bloggers supposed to do all that…erm, stuff you said? Oh. That’d explain a lot.
Yes, quality people. And a way inwhich to express yourself
for real.
I am constantly amazed that people blog for so many disparate reasons. I happen to think quality anything is the best.
I am with Tara on this.. you were one of my first blogging friends ever.. and I cherish our online friendship now.. Over the past two years it has been some journey huh? We have seen the blogs come and go.. I love reading your stories Mel.. I love your writting. heck I am all big puffy hearts for you..
Here, here! What a great post and so true. I’m toying with the idea of hosting my blog just to make a little bit of money from it, but then I think back to why I started it in the first place which was to get me writing again. Oh, and finding my sanity too! Well done!
PS I promise I’ll be back!!
Yes, it is! This is why I’m so excited for BlogHer. To meet you and all the other people I’ve come to “know”. To hug all the strangers who have become friends. I can’t wait!
I so agree.
In fact, that is when I started blogging, I refused to sell anything or post a huge quantity of ads on the site.
I just wanted to write for the joy of writing (and now to post my beloved photography, too) and was thrilled when I gained so many blogger friends in doing so.
I am like you in that I treasure every comment left, and the humor of others in response to my blog.
I have stopped reading many blogs that spend their time “promoting” things to sell…especially those that start out with a story that sounds legitimate only to have it end with a “pitch” for a product. It makes me feel foolish to have been sucked into a blog post only to find out it was a veiled advertisement to push a product.
I haven’t gotten into tweeting on purpose because I feel it is a waste of productive time to spend so much time on it. I will probably be the last person on earth to feel this way, but I would rather write on my blog, read other blogs or write some fiction of my own than write conversations back and forth.
Amen, Melissa! I have met such wonderful people (like you!) through blogging. Friendship is one thing money can’t buy! 🙂
yes.
it is.
what good is 96 followers if only 10 of them actually comment? I love my commenters…and wouldn’t have it any other way. 😀
I agree and now mine is private. I like it much better because I can spill my guts.
I love it…this is SO true. I’ve been blogging for more than 3 years and any time I get hung up on the numbers I get over it. Because what really makes quality blogging is the friendships and connections. Seriously. You rock!
OMG, goose bumps and tear ducts overdrive.I LUV U…’nuff said…
As someone who had to flee an old blog because of family issues, I know the “pain” of starting over.
I think the thing I’m learning this time around though, is that I don’t care if I’m the only person who ever knows what’s said on my blog as long as I can say what I want. It’s my outlet. It’s my way to measure my progress as a human being. I started it the day after a week of pure hurt and I’m sure if I had the guts to read any of those posts I’d see that not holding on to those feelings has really, truly made me feel better. (Even if anyone stumbling across it thinks I’m psychotic.)
Plus, the more I rant and rave over there, the better my essays for school get. 😉
Hell YES!
I was with ya at SSS and I’m with ya here.
This, rocks.
I started my blog as a way to hone my writing skills, and maybe get noticed.
I quickly discovered that the REAL benefit is the friendships that are made.
If you had told me a year ago that I would have true friends that I had never met, I would have told you that you were crazy. I don’t even get along with the women I DO meet.
And yet I have. Friends all over the US. One in Australia, one in the UK. One in Israel.
How cool is that?
I think I’d pick twitter over my own blog, I love it so much! I made a similar discovery as you. I rarely check my stats now, and don’t give much thought even to comments, or lack thereof. That’s NOT why I blog. 🙂
I so relate to this blog. I went through the same thing a month ago, and I then I realized the same as you. My blog and what/how I wanted to write was more important than the numbers. I realized that the numbers would come if I stayed true to myself instead of “forcing” the issue. And as you, I found more friends and camaraderie on twitter than anywhere else.
Just need my blog, you, and twitter my friend!
Well, I’m answering your dare. I really, truly, could care less about my comment numbers. Now, e-mail me-would ya-women.
Love ya,
Kel
You are totally, totally right. I hate forgetting it too. It is all about the friendship. Because of blogging I’ve found you. Which I think I need to kidnap the likes of you and a couple other bloggy girls I love and we go on a tropical vacation with high amounts of alcohol and laugh till it hurts. Great, Great, Great post. A great reminder. I LOVE YOU!
High five on that. It’s easy to get sucked into traffic games (for me) because I feel like it provides a quantifiable reason for the time and thought I put into blogging. Like, “See, this is why it matters!” But it’s not. I’ve gone for months without tracking traffic, and didn’ miss the numbers. But if my friends whose insight I rely on stopped commenting? Yeah, I would sooo miss that.:) Thanks for making me look at it differently.
Oh the good ol Buzz days…
I could not agree more and think it may be the reason why I have longer breaks between posts lately but not twittering!
Mel, I’m so glad that I found you again after you shut SSP down…I miss plurk, even though I think it’s still going isn’t it? And the Buzz… but through all these things, as you’ve said, it’s not the same as the comments on the blog. I’m trying to stay up with the twitter, but I must say I don’t think I’ve got quite the rhythm, or I’m logging on when my pals are off … or maybe I’m just getting too old to figure it out :)! I do like SITS because people really visit and really comment, which seems almost old school these days, doesn’t it?
I do love it here, though… and you, too, BTW ;)!
Heh. I missed this post. You were one of my first bloggy friends, remember?
Great post–I totally feel your frustration. I have realized that other writing opportunities can come from just having a blog. I never really thought I would make money on my blog (although I so wish I could) but keeping my creative juices flowing and keeping my “voice” in tune really helps when seeking out other writing gigs (not that I have had many, just starting really).
I love your blog for what its worth 🙂
You are soooo right. I think it’s a natural evolution that most bloggers go through. After a while you realize all the hype sites are just tit for tat in terms of hits and the best way to increase traffic is just to write well and try and keep up with the other writers you genuinely enjoy.