Let me preface this post…
It’s going to be a freaking pity party. So, if you’re not in the mood to listen to another blogger whine about blogging then feel free to continue on. I won’t be offended.
So…let the festivities begin.
I’m fed up.
I’m sick of watching my feeders numbers dwindle.
I’m pissing myself off by constantly reminding myself that…I didn’t friggen start this blog to be part of a massive popularity contest.
But…I didn’t. Really. I did NOT.
Because I’m SO OVER high school already. That was like…so 22 years ago!
I started blogging so I could write.
Because…I CAN write.
So I could document my insane thoughts with my crazy writing style.
So I could look back and remember the nutsy things my kids said or did.
And remember how I felt about things.
I started Such Simple Pleasures. My first blog. My first online lover.
Almost immediately, I was riding high on the blogging hobby horse.
My very id driven ego was being stimulated.
Blogging friends in droves.
I was fucking popular.
I turned into a bloggingnymphomanic.
And my reason for blogging got skewed. Which happens to so many of us!
Then…I got shot down in a blaze of Out-law lurking un-glory…
And had to resurface under here…
My beloved Rock and Drool…
The best freaking blog name. EVER.
And I’m still the same person.
And I still write in the same voice.
Only better. I write better than I did on Such Simple Pleasures.
I’m sick of fishing for comments.
Twitter and Plurking for gratification.
Like some street urchin sitting on a corner with a sign…will work for comments.
I’m driving myself insane with who is and who isn’t reading my blog.
I’m SO OVER wondering why I don’t have as many readers as other blogs.
I DON’T CARE.
Well…maybe a little.
I really don’t want to care.
I really don’t feel like comparing myself to you.
We are all so different.
Yet, we have so much in common.
And we all have voices in different pitches.
And we all have frustration in numbers…
Some are on a different scale than others.
And…I’m not weighing that way anymore.
I will continue.
I love this thing called blogging.
It’s my nicotine, caffeine and any other addicting substance…
All rolled into one little dot com of a rolling paper.
I don’t care anymore.
And…that part that still cares…a littlelotabit…
I’ll just keep talking to it.
Because…that little part…and the big part…
we both know what we have here.
And it’s full of really good and quirky life stories.
Now if you’ll excuse me…
I’m going to walk away from my computer for a day or two.
I have laundry to do.
Phone calls to return.
And most importantly…
A family to take care of.
American in Norway says
I hear ya chic…. I have been so bummed cause I lost 3 readers yesterday? What? was it something I said? I know I shouldn’t care… but it bugs me…
Hope you feel better! ; ) Hugs
Alison-Mountain Momma says
It’s really hard isn’t it? You want to be true to yourself but you also want people to comment and write and show that they are interested and care.
I had a lot of the same feelings and it came to the point where I had to learn to let go and understand that if I want to write, I should and if people need to see it they will!!
The people who matter don’t mind and the people who mind don’t matter.
oh, honey. dont beat yourself up. stay true to yourself. the people that come back are the ones that really matter, no?
i don’t comment very much outside my reader cause, in all honesty, i am busy as is everyone. you should not be fishing for comments. people will come back because they like what you write.
stay true. hugs.
Tara R. says
I do understand totally. I was a stat whore for a long time. Funny thing, is that the people who matter to me, the ones who have been with me so long (like you ~ mwah) are still here. That’s a big deal. Your legions of loyal fans will always have your back.
Heather, Queen of Shake Shake says
Aren’t comments and readership down all over? I mean, that’s what I’ve been telling myself. It’s the economy, stupid. heh
Numbers, ego, stats….what a game!
What they all said and more.
It’s hard not to get sucked in, not to feel the sharp twist of pain when your number plummets by 30, when a post you love and labored over, gets 9 comments. I read hundreds (seriously) of blogs daily, in my reader and hardly comment and then I remind myself, it can’t be just me.
Take your time off, enjoy yourself. we’re still here and we still love.
Just stopping by from SITS.
Have a great day!
I don’t comment every single time I read, it doesn’t mean I am not reading. I love what you have to say & will continue to read.
I have done this very “I didn’t blog for people to read & comment so why is it bothering me” song & dance a million times over. It is frustrating. When you decide to write again, I will still be reading & trying to get better at commenting.
Mom On The Run says
I’m sorry – you’re all mad that I haven’t stopped by in a while – I apologize. I’m a single mom this week. I love your blog and just ’cause I haven’t commented it doesn’t mean I haven’t been reading. I get my google reader feeds emailed to me in a digest.
If you go away for longer than 2 days I will hunt you down. I will. I always need me RD fix. I just am lame and commenting and now I feel really bad for not commenting. You can make me feel more pathetic when you come back. I’ll allow it. I promise!!!! I hearts you a lot!!!!!!
nice one! and if in any consolation to you.. a lot of bloggers lost some of
followers too.. or maybe not.. anyway.. there has been some beta products launched by Google.. and it is quite confusing, and I was one of the victim..
I will be waiitng for your post 🙂
Make or Break
I have found a few bloggers who are giving it up completely, I myself have found that I am not posting like I used to, it is just so disappointing to know you have this great post out there and no one is commenting or coming by. I think I will just give up looking at my numbers and start begging for comments. heh! If it helps, I am new here and I intend to keep coming by.
Im BeingHeldHostage says
you already know how I feel about this. I do agree that everyone’s readers are down (oh, and American in Norway– sometimes it’s just people deleting their blogs– it’s not you!)
I think your blog has changed a bit since SSP, but you couldn’t NOT change a little after having to give up a place you love because of the invasion. I know mine has changed dramatically since I took on some non-commenting readers I didn’t want to know about my place– the thing is, if you’re blogging to satisfy you, you will draw the people that you actually want around, the rest don’t matter.
You just focus on your little holiday now 🙂 If you want to email me to brag about how you’re preparing, I’ll be here.
It’s fun getting lots of comments, but I really love being able to just write whatever I want. When people get it and respond, excellent. If not, still excellent. I wrote what I wanted. Have fun with your family.
As long as I get one comment I’m happy. Although I’ve noticed that the longer I go between posts, the most comments I get on them. How do you know you’ve lost readers? I guess I don’t have anything like that to track them. I have site meter but I haven’t looked at it in ages because I don’t know how to read it properly. In a lot of ways I’m a blogging idiot. Still mainly a bluddite!
Breathe a bit, have some down time. I did it sort of involuntarily, but it was good for me I think.
I’ve never had the huge numbers to begin with, but I do read you on a daily basis. I just don’t comment like I should. I mean, I know that I should be commenting, but sometimes the energy to think of something to say that is different from the rest just doesn’t hit me.
I too have slacked in posting recently. But again, it’s that energy thing. That and my kids behave better the less I blog ….
ah, yes, I have those same feelings….and remind myself over and over that I am doing this blogging as my own therapy…to keep my sanity.
I think everyone feels this way. No matter how much you’re writing for yourself… and the “loyal readers”… you can’t help but wonder about those numbers.
I will say… from browsing the comments above mine… you have quite an amazing group of readers. I think that matters. Maybe quantity isn’t quite what you’d like… but you sure have quality readers.
Mary (MPJ) says
I know this is an old post, but I’ve been poking around and catching up and this one resonated.
I’ve stopped looking at my stats and it makes blogging a lot more fun. (Ok, I can still see how many comments I’ve got, but I don’t know how many subscribers or page views anymore. Keeping track of that was bad for me!)