I have a bunch of stuff. So…while I sit here binging on my kids Halloween candy…I’m going to just rattle them off. Because…I can’t think of a way to put it into a cohesive post. Not that I EVER have cohesive posts…
So…um…hold on, gotta look for a mini Twix bar…dang, I ate them all already!! Fine…Milky Way minis will have to do…
So I’ve decided that, and I’m sure this is a very ORIGINAL decision…
Men are just plain stupid. Seriously. And…I’m really curious as to how they can even function on such a limited brain capacity. Please someone…explain. And yet…we marry them. Have children with them…and bring more of these poor, unfortunate souls into the world. Well…at least they’re cute when they’re little.
And what’s the deal with men THINKING that they know how to fix things? Oh…yeah…it’s the whole thinking thing. They DON’T.
What? You want an example? OK…here are two…which make me questions Darwin’s theory of survival of the fittest…
Remember my garage door fiasco. When I backed my car into it and broke the car AND the bottom of the garage door…hey…I was preoccupied. I thought my kid was hurt. I’m functioning on MOMMY brain. It’s totally different from the MALE brain.
Well…stupid ass hubby thought he could fix it. And he made it six hundred dollars worse. And it’s still broken. Because, quite frankly…I don’t have 600 bucks right now!
And how about my kitchen faucet? OH…I haven’t told you about my kitchen faucet. This is a good one…
He…my hubby…was actually helping my clean the dishes. Yes, I was grateful…up until…he broke the tubing inside the pull out part of the faucet. And it was leaking under the sink. Like a freaking indoor swimming pool.
He decided to try to fix it. BWHAHAHAHA!!
So the plumber had to come out.
And it’s fixed now.
$160 bucks later. Which…is probably more than the faucet costs. So…next time, I’m hoping that he REALLY breaks the faucet. Because I saw one that I am DYING to get by Delta…or Kohler, can’t remember!!
And then there is flat out disrespectful stuff…
Friending every hole you’ve ever stuck something into…on facebook. I don’t care that they are the ones that friended you. You…should probably not friend them back. Remember…it wasn’t me that got myself into some trouble last Spring. When you decided that it was a really good idea to sneak and meet one of your “friends” at the bar.
So…don’t tell me I’m insecure. I’m not the one feeling the need to friend everyone I ever slept with or wanted to sleep with, to prove my attractiveness…or WHATEVER you are trying to prove to yourself.
Which is why I keeping blurting out things like…Pathetic. Or…Insecure…
If something I was doing offended you. You wouldn’t have a problem insulting me.
Too much. You. Are too much.
OK…I’m done insulting my husband…er…men…
My little son decided that we aren’t allowed to say his name with a y at the end anymore. That it’s too babyish. And…if we do say it that way…or ANYONE says it that way…he isn’t going to be our friend anymore…
It’s that easy to get rid of him, huh?
I walked today. For about an hour. Because I’m concerned about gaining weight.
So why the heck did I come home, grab the back of Halloween candy and start binge eating it?
I’ll chalk it up to stress. And marriage. And not smoking anymore…when I could REALLY use a cigarette. Right. Now.
OH hell…where’d I put that Snickers bar…
If a girl doesn’t feel like her own Dad is trustworthy, then how in the bloody hell is she supposed to trust her husband?
Boy, you are having a day. You were entertaining as always although I’m guessing that wasn’t what you were going for.
Hugs to you!
Grey Street says
Great. Thanks. Now I want candy. I’ll have to sneak the leftover halloween candy from the back of the office.
Well, I know how you feel. I’ve been there. And just yesterday in my 33 weeks of pregnancy while walking with my boyfriend back to our car from a MATERNITY STORE, he opened the door for me to help me into the car and I didn’t even have to turn around to know that he was watching a young, skinny hairstylist dressed up in black with tons of makeup on, walk past us.
I said to him “I don’t even have to look – I can HEAR your head turning!”. When I got in the car and looked at him he just had this stupid I-got-caught grin on his face and said “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”. YEAH, right.
Good for you for quitting smoking! Hang in there!
That is a loaded post. I wish you were nearer, I’d walk with you and then fight you for the milky way when we got back.
I don’t know what to tell you about the men thing… I really don’t. I kissed a lot of toads before I found the better than other toads that I’m married to now, but he’s still a guy and does irritatingly guy things daily.
Your hubby needs his facebook account closed. period.
Yeah, I got very lucky the second time around. But that’s because I waited till I was 40!
Yeah, first off, close his facebook account. Second of all, send him to a class on basic repairs. Even I can fix a sink, although probably not the garage door. (And I wouldn’t have tried.)
Third of all, BREATHE!!! And don’t worry about a couple of candy bars. Keep on walking and it will all even out.
Kudos on quitting smoking – I’m sorry it comes at such a stressful time!
Hey, Stranger! I’ve missed you.. I keep losing your new address! I guess dumbass Nis forgot to add her friend Melissa’s new blog to her blogroll. Duhhhh.. I will rectify today.
I missed some shit, didn’t I? Whoa..
I think your hubby needs a slap upside his head, because obviously he needs his sense knocked back into him!
Wow, I’ld be nervous around you if you were REALLY angry! lol Hope that day has passed into obscurity ! btw, Like your hubby, I too try to fix anything that breaks in the house…and it usually winds up costing me more in the end! But I gotta try!!!