OK…
So, I had a dentist appointment today. Yay me. I haven’t gone in *mumbling* 5 years or so…
BUUUUUT…
I have NO cavities. Never had ’em, never will. And the dentist told me “Someone looks like they take good care of their teeth”.
I had to look around the room to make sure he was talking to me. And when I realized he was…I snorted.
Back up though…
I didn’t eat ANYTHING before the appointment. I wanted to make sure there was nothing stuck between the teeth and that my breath was oh so pretty.
Move forward…
After the appointment…
By this time, I was DYING of starvation. DYING.
All I could think about was where I was going to stop for food.
And I was so lost in thought that…I missed my exit ramp. Yep…sure did.
The good news was, the next closest ramp was conveniently located near one of my most favorite SUSHI joints…Sushi Ko. Oh so yummy.
I called in an order…and was told it would take 20 minutes for my Inari, Spicy Tuna and Fancy California Roll…along with a tossed salad with ginger dressing. STARVING!!!
OH…and here is a side note, before I continue and you find out my epiphany…
Tim Horton. Iced Coffee. Sucks.
I went there to kill 20 minutes. And…I needed coffee. Major disappointment.
Back to my story…you still here? Good…
I pick up my sushi. And head off towards home…while tearing apart the take out container to get my Inari…which is tofu thinly sliced and battered, wrapped around sweet, white rice. YUMMY!!
I wasn’t paying attention. And…
I went through a red light. Yup. Sure did. Where are those damn cops when you need one…bwahahaha…
But I was a little shocked that I had done that. Very unexpectedly.
So…I shoved a piece of the Inari in my mouth. I figured I blew the light because of how hungry I was and so my vision was impaired, along with my judgment…
and it the bite…
was WAAAAAAYYYYY to big. And it GOT. STUCK. IN. MY. THROAT.
I panicked. I couldn’t breathe. I saw my life flash before my eyes.
The headlines were going to read…
Mother of five found dead. Choked to death on too big of a bite of sushi. Stay tuned to the 6 o’clock news. And…
Who would raise my babies?
So, despite the panic.
Despite the lack of oxygen going to my brain.
Despite the fact that I found that Tim Hortons Iced Coffee to be repulsive…
I grabbed it,
took a swig…
gasped for air…
coughed up some rice all over my brand new, handmade, crocheted bag…gorgeous…black, white and grey mohair and chenille…smashing…
And I had an epiphany…as I was choking to death. Well…two epiphanies but, they are related…
The first one…
Don’t ever go to the dentist on an empty stomach…especially when it takes over an hour there.
And the second…
Don’t EVER scarf down sushi, while starving…while driving.
You…could choke and die!!
And those…
where my epiphanies.
Thank You.
The End.
I don’t scarf down sushi while not driving but I will definitely remember not to do it while driving! 🙂
You are in major need of shock treatment. I cannot believe someone such as myself raised someone such as you.
Only by the grace of God… go I. I eat and drive all the time… thanks for sharing your harrowing experience. The life you save may be mine. Bwahahahaha… I’m glad you’re okay. Did the purse survive?
rofl on mom’s comment….
Your question on the yarn, they are 104yd skeins.
wow. that’s quite a tale!
well that explains the law in the UK– you can’t eat or drink while driving. It must be because they know we distracted Mom types will choke on the one bit of food we wolf down in the 5 minutes we have to do it in. I wonder if they’ve taken into consideration our impaired judgement while starving though…
You could’ve died twice– that’s why you got two epiphanies out of the deal. Glad you’re ok.
I eat and drive all the time and I often wonder how often this happens and what the odds are of it happening to me. That’s scary!
Um, I’m SO glad you didn’t die. That’s scary!!!
When I was younger (around 10 or so) I choked on a Lifesaver. Ironic, huh? My dad had to do the Heimlich maneuver and my aunt finally stuck her finger and long acrylic nail down my throat and pulled it out. My throat was sore for days. I however, had no epiphany. Unless you count the fact that I realized that mommy was right when she said don’t run with candy in your mouth!
I went to the dentist last week & did have a cavity. But I went with a full belly, so as not to choke on sushi while driving home 🙂
Funny post, Melissa!
I am so glad that sushi didn’t take you out. You would really be missed, darling.
Well, then.
I’m glad you didn’t die, that would’ve been embarassing!
Hmm. We don’t have a sushi place. Or a Tim Horton’s. I generally don’t eat in the car because I drive a stick shift and don’t have enough hands. So maybe I’m safe. Um, no we have coal trucks and log trucks. yeah, I’m toast.