I just realized that today was 9-11.
I can’t believe how many years ago our country was attacked by that whack job and his cronies.
I remember EVERYTHING…VIVIDLY about that day. The whole freaking day.
I remember driving to work and talking to my mom on my cell. She told me that a plane had just hit the World Trade Center. And…as we were talking, the 2nd plane hit.
I remember going into work and everyone was talking about it as we were getting the jewelry cases ready for the store to open.
I remember the television in a corner. And how, periodically, we would all go and check to see what was happening…
When another plane crashed into the Pentagon. And the whole world realized that we were under some sort of terrorist attack.
And then, another plane went down in a field.
I remember wanting to leave work. I desperately wanted to get my children. One of them from kindergarten, the other…at the preschool. But I wasn’t allowed to leave. The owners of the store wouldn’t let me.
And I remember the owners of the store. Their concern for how this was going to hurt THEIR business. That’s when I realized that, no matter how philanthropical these people were…they really were just more concerned about their own bank accounts…and I couldn’t stand them.
I remember the gas prices soaring to well over 5 dollars a gallon. And the lines at the grocery stores were tremendous. Because, no one knew what was really happening and we needed to stock up on food and gas…just in case.
I remember watching the Trade Center collapse.
I remember hearing how high the death toll was…DEVASTATINGLY high.
I remember how horribly I felt for those who lost family, friends, loved ones…so many.
9-11 changed me. It changed everyone.
We all lost something that day.
Where before, I had a false sense of security, living in the United States of America…now…I have none.
I worry every time I drop my son off at preschool…
I worry every time I drop my kids off at Sunday School…
I worry EVERY time we go to Temple for the holidays…
I don’t live my life in fear. I refuse. But…I worry. Mostly because, if anything happens. If, god forbid, there are more atrocities committed by those extremists, on American soil…
How do I protect my children?
That is what I worry about. That is the only thing I care about. Protecting the children. All the children.
I hate that I don’t feel safe anymore. But more than anything…I hate that I don’t feel like my children are safe. Not really. Because, you just never know.
We were blindsided all those years ago…well, at least the majority of us didn’t know ahead of time that there was going to be a horrible act of terror.
Who is to say that it won’t happen again?
So, we keep on living our lives. Pretending that America is completely safe. Pretending that our government can protect us. Trying to get back our false sense of security. And ignoring the tingling at the nape of our neck. Our Spidey Senses…always on high alert. Silently bracing ourselves for the next time…
Hopefully there won’t be a next time.
My thoughts today are with everyone whose life was horrendously touched by this tragic event.
May you find peace.
Colleen - Mommy Always Wins says
I didn’t write a 9/11 post because I just don’t even know what to say. But I feel its important to teach our kids what happened (at whatever levels they can understand without being scared) so that they, too, will never forget.
Laurie Kendrick says
I wrote a post; I felt I knew exactly what to say. If there was one bright spot that resulted from the horrific events of that, it’s that we came together. tragedy tend to do that.
We waived flags, proudly displayed them in our front yards. Placed our hands over our hearts during the Star Spangled Banner and shed tears when we sang the lyrics.
We gave to charities to help relieve the burden of the families of the victims .
Disbelief over what happened caused us to believe again.
But that didn’t last.
Seven years later, we hate, we’ve idiots with misplaced values protesting national conventions, war, soaring gas prices, idiocy reigning supreme on every level of government and we hate each other again.
And now Ike.
Obama is an unpatriotic idiot and McCain is old and feeble. Republicans are evil and Democrats are stupid whining and accusatory.
Seven years later, I suppose things have returned to normal.
And that’s damned sad.
Nice post. Thank you.
My employer at the time sent us all home (gotta love small non-profits). There were two things that stood out for me on that day.
Our friends had their first child on 9/11. He was born at the exact moment the second tower fell.
The previous May I had been on a business trip to New York. We had built in one day for sightseeing. It was in the 90s. The hottest first week of May New York had ever had I think. We were on the ferry coming back from the Statue of Liberty and looking at the World Trade Center. One of the folks I was with said, “Should we go there today? It’s almost dinner time.”
And I said, ‘Why don’t we wait, and go there next time?’
Tara R. says
I remember exactly where I was and what I was doing on that day. I had just dropped off my son at school and was driving home when I heard the news on the radio. I called Hubs, who was working on the Air Force Base in town. The base went on lock down and all non-essential personal was sent home. He and I watched the news reports and video over and over. I wanted to get both kids and bring them home and keep them home.
Like Colleen I didn’t know how to express how I was feeling today. But, as I was leaving for work this morning, I stopped, went back into my house, brought out our flag and hung it outside our front door.
Thank you for posting this today.
I too did a post and sadly it all has gone back to normal unfortunately. I don’t think anyone will truly forget though, I mean how could you? Everyone’s lives were touched in one way or another. Great post and love the spidey senses comment!
HI!! I hope you find peace as well. I guess since we can’t anticipate these things it makes the unknown scary. It makes uncertainty scary and all of that causes worry. You’re right, we just go on with our lives, but we have to remember to try to live the best and happiest life so we have no regrets. Try to be the best person, woman, child, parent that we can be so that we can be thankful for those times if faced with a tragedy of that magnitude. I heard someone say recently that it’s “when” we face a tragedy of that magnitude because it’ll definitely happen again. Although I don’t consider myself an overly optimistic person I think that we have to have hope that good will win. That this sort of hate, murder and destruction will stop so we don’t have to worry. One could only hope, huh?
I lived in fear for so long after 9/11. I lived with nightmares and horrible fears. I lived thinking that we were going to be bombed or a horrible agent released on to us and we would instantly die. It was horrible. We changed vacation plans because I refused to fly. I lived my life so differently than I should have. It took me a long time to learn to not live in fear. To learn to actually live and feel good.
It’s hard each year to not fall back into that around this time. I remember the strength of those around me. Those that rescued others. Those that saved lives and those that gave their lives. That’s what makes me actually live. That’s what keeps me out of the fear.