To My Darling Family:
I’ve decided that we need to start working on your vocabulary. School is starting soon and I want you to be ahead of the game…this includes you, too…sweet hubby of mine.
Here is how it works.
I have a few words in mind. Ones that you all know. But…you OBVIOUSLY don’t understand. It’s a small list. But the words…BIG in meaning. Ready? Keep in mind…the definitions are my own and I think that they will be easy enough for all of you to understand…
Cleanliness: keeping your room and your body…neat and tidy…and scent free. We have a kitten that is peeing all over the house. Your smells are not making the matter any better.
Reciprocation: I clean your room, you keep it clean. I wash and fold your clothes, you put them away neatly…NEATLY. I keep the house clean…you help to keep the house clean. I make the meals, you eat them without complaining. Is this making any sense? Do you see a pattern here?
Appreciation: A freaking thank you every once in a while…without me having to remind you…will do nicely. THANK YOU!
Helpful: If I am upstairs cleaning MY part of the room…and there are dishes in the dishwasher that need to be put away, and laundry that needs to be folded…AND…dishes that need to be moved from the sink INTO the dishwasher…then why is it you are in the basement on the computer…HUH? WHA?
Intonation: It’s not always what you say…it’s how you say it. Whiny, shrill, bitchy, attitudinal…those INTONATIONS…they aren’t working. They make me want to line you all up and slap you, one at a time, across the face…but I wouldn’t do that because…I’m
Respectful: Don’t touch. Don’t hit. Don’t call each other names that hurt. You can’t take those back and some of them are traumatizing. If you love each other…respect each other. And…respect your parents. When we tell you no…it’s no. When we tell you maybe…it’s no. When we tell you yes…it’s maybe. Watch the INTONATIONS…and be RESPECTFUL when you don’t get your way! Also…don’t break each others things. More importantly…don’t break my things!!!!
Well, these are just a few to get you started.
Study them, learn them, live them. Because, there will be pop quizzes…DAILY! And flunking is NOT an option!!
Great list and great words. I hope they learn!
Hey, I think I need to print this out and put in on my fridge too…I’ll have to change a few words as L is not the problem. ha. xoxo ash (www.bosssanders.com)
so grateful to be Mormon says
hi melissa ~ adorable post. you made me grin, kathleen
the planet of janet says
“It’s not always what you say…it’s how you say it.”
have you been peeking into my windows??
i may have to post this list as well.
the planet of janet says
i meant on my fridge. fingers move faster than brain.
HAHA! Can I get an Amen!
dysfunctional mom says
I’m passing this out to the family!
Boy – this is certainly true in my house. Especially the whining…I’m hanging this on my fridge too. Thanks for the laugh.
Sandy (Momisodes) says
Genius! Ditto to them all…especially Intonation. My child knows how to make the word “Mommy” sound whiny in 40 different ways.
Um, can you email this to my kids while you’re at it?? Maybe they can come to your house for tutoring???? Sounds great to me!!
Okay, seriously. Can we PLEASE go out for a martini or three???
Tara R. says
I’m loving this! Do you tutor… make house calls… help!?!
AfrickenMEN, sister. Africkenmen!!
Anglophile Football Fanatic says
I hate to say it, but good luck with that. It’s a never ending battle, isn’t it?
I’m going to print this out and enlarge it and hang it all over the house! Although somehow I doubt that will help!
Perfect Summer lesson. I think I’ll print it and hang it on the fridge…
Oh I SO dread the teenage years.