We had to pick my step-kids up from their mothers place yesterday. Actually…their grandmothers place…their mother lives in the basement there. Anyway…
Watching my step-daughter walk out to our car, my husband remarks about how grown up she is getting. How truly amazing the difference is between last year and now. She smiles at us, seemingly knowing that we are talking about her. Turns around. Saunters off, back into the house to get her stuff.
What is taking so long…I ask my husband. We need to hurry. We are supposed to meet my parents for lunch for Fathers Day.
My husband gets out of the car and goes into the house. Almost immediately…he comes running out.
I HAVE to go in there. My step-daughter NEEDS me!
Great. But, isn’t her mom in there. I’m trying to listen to a really cool version of “Let My Love Open the Door” by the Who.
Yeah, her mom is in there. But…she needs ME. NOW!
So…I run into my husbands ex-in-laws house. By the way…being the consummate snob that I am…I would have turned my nose up at the whole family, way back when. But, I digress…
I run into the house and am directed into a closet…er…bathroom. My step-daughter is standing there with her underwear around her ankles and her mother is just standing there.
“I got my period.” She says.
“Wha…” I start to cry.
I look at her biological mother. Who is still just standing there. Like a MORON. Not doing anything.
So…I say to the mother…”Um…do you have any pads?”
I think I might of awakened her. She walks over to a little linen closet and pulls out some maxi-pads. And…hands them to ME. The step-mother.
I kick the Mother MORON out of the bathroom and slam the door. And, I instruct my young daughter…who has just now become a woman…how to put the maxi pad into her underwear.
While her mother is on the other side of the bathroom door. NOT. DOING. ANYTHING. Except standing there. Waiting.
And, I’m still crying. Because…my little girl. The one who we just noticed has grown up so much in the last year…can now, officially, have babies.
And that is sickening!!
And amazing.
And so depressing.
And incredible.
And…she’s better NOT. Not for, at least, 20 more years!
After we were all done in the bathroom, we open the door to find her biological mother. Still standing there. Seriously!
She says to her daughter…”Well, there isn’t anything you can do about it. So embrace it. Make womanly choices now…because you’re a woman.”
OK…what the FUCK does that mean? She is telling a 12 year old to make womanly choices. Is she serious? She is still a kid. Who happens to have gotten her period. There is nothing womanly about her.
I kind of push her out of the way…it’s a tiny little hall…and I take my kids hand. And…she says goodbye to her mom.
And we leave.
Her mother is still standing there.
I wonder if she ever moved..
But…
MY little girl. She got her period. And I cried. And I showed her how to use a pad.
I can’t believe it!
I wasn’t prepared for this. It happened so fast. Her growing up.
And that is what I’M embracing. Enjoying my children. And watching them grow up.
It’s truly. A. Miracle.
You handled this way better than I will when it comes time for my daughter. Good thing you were in the car at that very moment when she needed you! I have a feeling the mom is still standing there doing nothing!
Way to go. You saved the day. 😉
What a milestone. I can’t even imagine. My mom took me out to a nice meal and we talked for a long time that night. i remember that.
How nice that you were there for/with her. What a truly special (step) mom you are. How could she just stand there?
I love this story. Her mom probably never had a mom who could help her, either (sad). I’m glad your daughter has you. My my was NOT into talking about this stuff, so I figured it out on my own. I made sure Kendall knew what to expect, and when she got her period, we were both ready. Last week, she told me about how she and a bunch of her friends were at “Lisa’s” house when Lisa got her period (for maybe the 3rd time). She had no idea what to do with a tampon, and Kendall told about how she (Kendall) showed Lisa how to put a tampon in. She said, “Mom, it was so cool. I really felt important and helpful. I’m glad I was there.” Isn’t breaking the cycle awesome?
Its an OMG moment!
I am not ready for dau to join the club
yet but I know shes on the path….
YOU are a great MOM ! Crying too!
You IS the MOM !
I can’t believe her standing outside the door???????
I can’t believe her mom just stood there…. WTF?
That was truly a ‘mommy and me’ moment, and I am so glad it was you who she turned to. Unbelieveble how clueless her bio-mom is. She is so lucky to have you in her life.
you. are. the. best.
seriously.
The ex? What a bitch! Way to step in. You are so good at improv mothering. You totally should do something great for her, just the two of you. Like pedicures.
Thank goodness for you!!!!!!
Okay.. .I have been having this conversation for about 3 years now and my daughters are only 9 and 11. They are so informed it is CRAZY. I also bought the book ALL ABOUT YOU for girls. Very cool book with straight-forward descriptions of anything and everything.
The “real” mom… omg.. My jaw drops… but some moms just never are able to handle that stuff. I was the third daughter of four girls and I never had heard of a period.. and my mom was much like your ex… just no ‘splaining some folks!
Her mother just stood there? Wha’?
You are truly a great mom!!
My mom cried when I got mine, too! She, like you, was so excited that I had become a woman. I, on the other hand, was pissed! Now, I cry from happiness every month that I get it! 🙂
Wow, her mom just stood there? I’m glad she has you…
My Ladybug got her period at the end of last year…..just BEFORE she turned 12. I was so not ready!
Womanly choices? Ick.
I am speechless over that woman.
She is indeed YOUR little girl, and she will always, always know that, if she didn’t already.
You cried! How sweet is that. And CONGRATS to the new woman! My Mom used to take us out to a special dinner when we got our periods. Although I don’t remember it. She swears we went….
It’s a good thing you were there…they might still be in the bathroom!
You truly are the best!
Girl, you rock. I’m dreading that moment, myself, when my little girl gets hers, but how cool are you for being there when your little girl needed you so much. xoxo
That woman should be shot. Anyway, thank you for being the good and level-headed and sweet Mom to that girl that you are. Oh my gosh…this made me remember back to when I started having periods and I was so excited to tell my bio-mom about it (I didn’t live with her either). I thought she would welcome me to womanhood and all that other fun stuff. And get all emotional and whatever. So, I remember asking her to come into the bathroom with me, shut the door and I told her. She looked at me and said, “So?” Yeah, some people were not made to be moms….you are. And that is why I love ya! (among other reasons, but a darn good reason.)